As human beings, we are quick to identify ourselves using our conditions, how others perceive us, our behaviors, or our positions in life. It’s somehow comforting to clothe ourselves in these identities. But none of those are really who we are. And the problem with latching onto these identities is, in addition to limiting our growth, it leaves us lost and confused when they are stripped from us.

So, let’s have a conversation about essence, identity, and disconnecting from our “false” identities to discover who we are in the actual sense.

We are all attracted to comfort and we easily conform to whatever provides ease whether it’s an idea or a belief system.
For example, most thieves are comfortable stealing because they agree with the fact that their acts have become who they are.
These acts started developing due to external factors but that is not who the person, characterized by the act of stealing” is

We hold on to the supposedly negative identities. “I’m a liar,” or “I’m not learned” or “I’m not social enough.” The reason for maintaining a negative identity is that it surrounds us in an easily-defined, cozy comfort zone. We are seemingly realistic about what we can and cannot do, so we never have to venture out.

Most people exalt their “default setting” above the idea of growth and personal improvement.
“This is how I was created”. Shifting the blame to a near-absolute fact, for example, creation and the act of procreation is another tactic employed to subtly remain unaware of the dangers their inability to be responsible for their actions poses.
Your ability to be self-aware is one step to knowing who you are and the sincerity that comes with it is the drive that causes one to venture out in search of cleaner pastures, mentally in this case.

Mental detoxification happens only when one is sincere with oneself. The truth hurts and that pain is a sign of progress. So stop offering justifications for your bad character, deficiencies, and failures.
Finally, your definition of yourself shouldn’t be based on your immediate or past experiences. Those experiences can affect what you do but it doesn’t affect who you are.

In our next article, we will be discussing some examples of these false or negative identities and we will examine how to detach ourselves from them to discover who we are.